5 Tips for Mothers of the Bride and Groom
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Friday, April 24, 2015
By Ambreen Zaveri
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Happy (almost) Mother’s Day! If you’re reading this, your “little” girl or boy is probably getting married, or maybe you’re the one getting married and you’re looking for some helpful hints for the mothers involved—either way, congratulations! This big day should be memorable and fun for brides, grooms, moms, dads, and everyone in between.

That being said, I wanted to share some preparation and wedding-day tips for a fabulous, stress-free wedding for all, and especially for Mom.

Mom, if this is your first child’s wedding, you probably don’t know what to expect.
A million things are likely running through your mind, including budgets, decorations, dress shopping, cakes, guests, the other mother, and your sweet bride or groom-to-be.

It’s easy to get stressed out, but don’t! Your child will need to be reminded that the wedding is just one day, while a marriage is a lifetime affair. Maybe you need to remember the same thing! This view really helps bring all those little annoyances into perspective.

However, those things still need to be addressed. So, let’s get started with my tips for dealing with the wedding blisses and burdens.

1. Help, but don’t over do it.
Planning a wedding is taxing, as you know. As a parent helping with the process, it’s easy to get overly invested and extremely stressed out. Sure your money may be involved in the plans, but don’t let the small details get to you. Let your bride and groom choose the cake flavors, seat cushions, placemats, and whatever without getting too overwhelmed. As the mom you get to have some fun, like dress shopping and helping pick out flowers! Insert your two cents where necessary and when it’s asked for, and let the little stressors that can drive you crazy fall someplace else.

2. Get dressed.
Traditionally, the Mother of Bride chooses her dress first. Besides that, there are only a couple other rules to abide by: avoid wearing white (or ivory, cream, or any pale color similar to white) and dress for the occasion (beach, formal, outdoor, casual). Shop early enough that you aren’t stressed out at the last minute. Leave time for alterations, and find something that you love and that is comfortable.

Specialty shops offer more customized service and tips for coordinating with the wedding party than department stores, but department stores also have great options. Nordstrom has some great choices for ladies of all shapes and sizes, and wedding styles. They also offer a specialty experience in a department store setting when shopping in-store.

A good rule of thumb is to wear a neutral or muted color. Wearing a bright turquoise dress when the wedding party is wearing white, gray, and pastel pink will make you the star of the show, versus the bride and groom, and so on.

3. Don’t compare yourself to the other mother.

I’ve been to a lot of weddings and met a lot of mothers. By the time the wedding happens the parents of the bride and groom have usually met, but probably don’t know each other very well. This dynamic can cause some unnecessary competition between moms. The other mom will inadvertently be a part of your life for the rest of your life, so try to become friends. Remember, you’re both in it for your kids.

4. Don’t take on more than you can handle.
On the day of the wedding there will be a million tasks that need to get done. As a mom, it’s normal to want to help with everything but don’t bite off more than you can chew. Try to help with tasks you know you can accomplish and delegate others to friends and family who are willing to help.

This day is important for you too, so leave some time to take care of yourself and relax. A stressed out family and wedding party won’t result in genuine smiles when the wedding finally happens.

5. Have a great breakfast and pamper yourself.
Try to get a restful night of sleep in before the wedding. Wake up early and have a long shower, a big and healthy breakfast, and, of course, your morning coffee. Wedding days are very busy and remembering to eat can be harder than you’d think. Make sure you’re energized enough to handle your tasks and welcome family and friends with a smile on your face.

It’s also a great idea to stay hydrated and do some light exercise. Anything you can do to keep your spirits high and your body feeling healthy!

Moms, dads, brides, and grooms—you’ve got this.  This day is going to be everything you dreamed of and more! Relax, breathe, and enjoy it for all that is it. I am so excited for you and the future that’s in store for your entire family. 

A marriage isn’t only the beginning of a wonderful new life, but also the beginning of a new family.  Every bride may some day become a mother and start her own family. To all our brides and grooms out there, I would like to remind you to take a moment as you plan your wedding to appreciate your mother bringing you into this world as part of her family years ago, raising you, and nurturing you with love.

I’ve had the privilege to meet some wonderful mothers throughout my photography career and have witnessed some priceless, emotional moments shared between mothers, daughters and sons. So, in honor of every mom out there, here are some of my favorite “mom moments” from the wedding and family shoots I’ve done over the years. Happy Mothers Day!



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